Welcome to Unfiltered with Love. I'm your host, Carrie Love. I've been seeing a term everywhere lately, situationships. And it made me wonder when did relationships become so unclear? It feels like we've moved into this space where people are connected but not really defined. It's more than casual, but not quite a relationship. And somewhere in the middle of that, it leaves a lot of people confused. A situationship is one of those things that doesn't really have a clear definition. You're spending time together, there's emotional connection, there may even be exclusivity, but there's no label, no clear direction, and sometimes no real conversation about what it actually is. And I think that's where things start to get complicated. And even the way we talk about relationships now feels different. I remember talking to my mom one day and I said something about being in a connection with someone. And she looked at me and said, A connection? Isn't that just a relationship? And I thought that was interesting because the terminology we use now has changed so much. We say things like talking or seeing someone or in a situationship or a connection. And it's almost like we've created all these in-between terms instead of just calling something what it is. There are a lot of reasons people avoid labeling relationships now: fear of pressure, fear of losing independence, fear of getting hurt. And some of it is just wanting to keep things open, not wanting to feel tied down too quickly. And I get that, because not every connection needs to be rushed into something serious. But at the same time, when you avoid clarity altogether, it creates confusion. There's also a difference between monogamy and commitment. And I don't think they're always the same thing. Monogamy means you're only with one person, but commitment is something deeper. It's intention, it's emotional investment, it's choosing someone consistently. And sometimes those things get confused. Because you can be monogamous and still not fully committed, and you can take time to build commitment without avoiding it completely. And something I've realized because this conversation comes up a lot, is that for me, it's not really about the label. I don't necessarily need to define something right away, but I do want to understand what we're doing. Are we monogamous? Are we building something? Or are we just drifting? Because that's where the confusion comes in. It's not about what you call it, it's about being on the same page. And when you're not on the same page, that's when people start to feel uncertain or disconnected or unsure of where they stand. And that kind of clarity, even if it's simple, matters more than the label itself. Something else that comes up is this. If you're confused about a person, or if a person is confused about you, what does that really say? Because I still believe when you know, you know. And that goes both ways. You can feel when something is right, but you can also feel when something isn't. And I think sometimes we don't want to accept either one. We don't want to accept that something isn't right, but we also don't want to accept when something is right, because both of those things require a decision, and decisions require change, because knowing isn't always the hard part. Sometimes it's accepting it. And it doesn't mean you need to rush into anything, but it also doesn't take endless time or endless conversations to recognize how you feel about someone. And I've experienced this myself, especially being back out on the dating scene after a long-term marriage. Things feel different now. The way people approach relationships, the pace, the expectations, it's just not the same. And I remember being in a situation early on after my divorce where things moved really fast, too fast. There was talk of commitment very early on, and I could feel in my body that something wasn't right. But at the same time, I was in a very vulnerable place. Coming out of something long-term like that, you're just trying to figure out how you feel again. And I felt numb. I didn't even know if I could feel love the same way again. And part of me wondered, is this just what it feels like now? But deep down I knew, and that's the part that matters. Because even in confusion, even in vulnerability, there's still a part of you that knows. And I think sometimes when we ignore that, it's not because we don't feel it, it's because we're trying to make something work that we're not fully aligned with. And I think a lot of people have probably experienced this, where you're in something that feels like a relationship, but no one is actually saying it. And you start to question yourself, like, what is this? And instead of asking, sometimes people just sit in that uncertainty, hoping it becomes something more. And that can be a really uncomfortable place to be. And it's interesting when you look at how dating used to be, when you look about our parents' generation or even our grandparents' generation, people dated differently. They would date multiple people at the same time. Not in a dishonest way, but in a way that allowed them to actually get to know different people before choosing one. There wasn't constant communication, there weren't cell phones, there wasn't social media, you didn't text all day, you didn't feel like you had to define something immediately. You spent time with people, you got to know them, and commitment came after that process. Now it almost feels like the opposite. Things move really fast emotionally, but at the same time, people hesitate to define anything. So you end up with connection without direction. We're always connected. There's this expectation if you're talking to someone, it should mean something right away. But at the same time, there's hesitation to define anything. So it creates this strange dynamic where we want connection, but we don't want to feel tied down. We want closeness, but we're afraid of commitment. The real question becomes: are we avoiding commitment or are we afraid of choosing? Because choosing someone means being vulnerable, taking a risk, letting go of other possibilities, and that's uncomfortable. But avoiding that choice altogether can leave people stuck in something that never really moves forward. I don't think the answer is to rush into labels, but I also don't think the answer is to avoid clarity. Healthy looks like being honest about what you want, being clear about your intentions, and allowing things to develop without avoiding the conversation. Because there's a difference between taking your time and avoiding commitment altogether. Maybe the question isn't whether we need labels, but whether we're being honest about what we actually want. Because clarity doesn't have to feel restrictive. Sometimes it's actually what creates connection. This is Unfiltered with Love. I'm your host, Carrie Love, and I'm really glad you're here.